Living through a life of miscalculations, is one of the most challenging thing you may have to do in order to exist in our society as it is today. I sometimes wonder if it is all real or just bad dream that I haven't woken up from yet. With the way that things keep changing it is no wonder we manage to keep our sanity it all. In the past 3 years I have overcome a broken arm while going through a pandemic that sprang up and caused havoc in all of our lives. We have witnessed such a total loss of life that seems to be hanging on by a thread. We have all been forced in to a life where we are afraid to be sociable on come in contact of anyone who might be considered a possible threat to our health. This fear has brought out a lot of ill feelings in one way or another. But we all have had to manage to co-exist once again. The fear is still there but no longer and overshadowing issue as before.
Our economy is another issue in itself with less and less supplies to go around due to lack of being able to keep up with the growing need of various items to help us get through our lives in fashion that we have become accustomed to, whether it be food, materials or our natural resources. Which have been on a little bit of a tailspin of it's own as of late. Gas price go up and then drop only to rise again the following month, something we have grown to get used to over the past few years. But now the other major resources have decided to get in the act of it all. I really wish can stop playing this game that they have us on and go through normalcy once and for all. For some of us we will weather the storms as they come, but for those who aren't able to bounce back as fast or at all I truly feel sorry for them. But that's life as they say. Kind of a truly callous thing say in itself but it is what it is until someone can figure a way out of it.
I know my time is running out little by little but no one knows for sure when their time has come or not, only the hope of being just a little bit longer to accomplish one more task whatever that may be, but I know it is only a matter of time in which I hope to spend loving my immediate family but mostly my daughter in whom I worry about the most. Not because she will not be able to take care of herself but mainly cause I have loved her my whole life and would really miss being unable to be there for her in whatever she may need for, even if it's just to make here laugh to ease her pain or get through a bad moment in her life.
So with all that matters to me in my life and the stuff that you may cling to just remember that our loved ones were given to us as a gift in which we should cherish with our whole heart for however long it is possible to do so. I know that it might not be possible for some of you because of distance or availability to do so but communicate with them by whatever means you have. Just to let them know that you care enough to say what they mean to you as well. I'll ends this by saying that a really am grateful for my daughter and the joy she brings to my heart because without her my time would have already come after the loss of my son in whom I truly miss for theses past few years especially but in all for a total of 14 years coming up in April. Love you Mijo you don't know how much I am truly sorry that I wasn't able to be more there for you. You are truly missed and this household is not the same without you in it.
With regards to my life I can only hope that I will be around long enough to be there for my daughter without become to much of a burden it the process. Love you Mija for all the exasperating times we have been in from one heated discussion to another, but through it all I have never stopped realizing how special you have made my life just having out little outings from time to time. So with this I have to acknowledge I have truly enjoyed it all especially our fun shopping trips in whatever store we end up in. So thank you for being in my life I have never regretted you in my life.
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